Archive for the ‘Wedding Planner Event Planner’ Category

Hey All! Frugalbride posted this great article on Wedding Etiquette. Some of it is old school (which they readily admit), but it is really some great basics. Enjoy 🙂

What you are about to read are things to do and not to do at your wedding. Some of the information comes from professional etiquette guides and other information comes from what we’ve learned through the years. So if you want to pull this day off the PROPER way keep reading. If you don’t fancy etiquette rules, FB has given you a few suggestions.


If you don’t want children at your wedding, you have 2 options:

  • When addressing your invitations, leave the children’s names off it and also don’t mention them in the invitation.
  • Have friends and family pass the word around that you don’t want children there.

FB Says: How many people know or understand etiquette. In some cases you have to cut straight to the chase and say what you mean. We suggest adding one of these phrases to the bottom of your reply card:

  • Adult Reception
  • We hope that the (# of) of you will be able to join us
  • (# of) seats have been reserved in your names

Other invitation stuff:

  • If someone hasn’t responded to your invitation, 1 week past the “Reply by” date, call him or her and confirm over the phone.
  • Children over the age of 16 get their own invitations. (FB thinks 18 is sufficient)
  • Your officiant and their better half get an invitation
  • Send your parents and wedding party invitations, as a keepsake. They don’t have to reply.
  • You have to put return postage on your RSVP’s.


  • It is considered rude to put “cash only gifts”, or other wording meaning the same thing on the invitation.
  • You’re not supposed to put registry information on your wedding invitation. It’s left up to friends and family to inform everyone. However, you can put gift information on an insert in your bridal shower invitations. FB Says: If you have a personal wedding website with info for bridal party and guests (and gift registry info), you can include an insert with the link to your website in your wedding invitation.
  • You’re not required to open your gifts at the reception or in front of anyone.


  • You’re supposed to return the engagement ring (now that’s hilarious!!!)
  • You have to send back all the gifts with a brief explanation why it was cancelled. (So don’t use anything until you say, “I do”.)
  • It’s written that if a gift is engraved or personalized, you don’t have to return it.
  • Don’t speak poorly of your ex because somewhere down the line you might get back together. (Darsi added this one all by herself.)
  • You should inform out-of-town guests first so that they can change or cancel their travel and lodging arrangements.
  • If you’re postponing your wedding, of course every guest has to be contacted. Etiquette pros say that you have to send another invitation with the new date.


If you’ve been married before or have children it’s perfectly acceptable to wear white.

If you’ve been married before or have children you’re not supposed to wear a veil or have a train attached to your dress or carry orange blossoms. (Must be a sign of purity or virginity thing).

The second time around, your parents are not obligated to pay for anything.

If you get along with your ex-husband and his family and it’s fine with your fiancé, then it’s acceptable to invite them to the wedding. (why you’d want to is another story)


  • Don’t seat battling relatives together.
  • So that everyone has a good time, seat teens together, aunts and uncles together, etc. Try seating groups either by their relationship to you or by their ages.
  • As for the head table, the rule has changed so often that there isn’t one anymore. You and your better half can sit at a raised table with your wedding party below you. You can have your own table with a table on either side of you with your wedding party. You and your husband in the middle of a long table with men on one side and women on the other, or boy, girl, boy, girl. Parents and grandparents at the table or not, it’s up to you.
  • Stick to table numbers. Famous couples, places you’ve been, etc., are hard to see from across the room. We’ve heard many complaints by guests at weddings, when they have to search for their tables.
  • Reserved tables are all you need. Why put yourself through the extra work of having a reserved chair for each guest? It just gives people something else to complain about.
  • It’s a good idea to have a “Reserved” card at the parents seats. They are the only ones that need preferred seating.


  • Don’t assume that the couple knows you’re coming to their wedding. You must send back your reply card before the “Reply by” date.
  • If you have declined an invitation, you are not expected to send a gift.
  • If you arrive at the church during the procession, you should wait until the bride has gone down the aisle before entering. Also, don’t peek through the doors to watch because you’ll be in her photos.
  • If you are late for the ceremony, you should walk down an outside aisle and find a seat quickly and quietly.
  • If you are of a different faith, you are not required to participate in the rituals, but if you want to that’s fine.
  • You have to buy the couple a gift.
  • The gift should be something that they can both use.
  • If you have sent a wedding gift through the mail, then you don’t have to bring another one to the reception.
  • It’s wise to give a cash gift to couples that are getting married out-of-town because they will have to ship everything back home and that’s an added cost to them.
  • Many couples that have lived together for awhile will not register for gifts. That’s because they already have everything they need. In this case, cash in a wedding card is appropriate.
  • Guests pay for their own transportation and lodgings.


Bride’s Family

  • All Reception Costs
  • Church Fees
  • Groom’s Rings
  • Invitations
  • Flowers for Church, Bridesmaids and Reception
  • Music for Ceremony
  • Transportation for Bridal Party
  • Gifts for Bridal Party
  • Groom’s Gift
  • Lodging for Bridesmaids, if necessary

Bridal Party

  • Your Attire
  • The Shower
  • If you’re from out-of-town, Transportation to the Town the wedding is in
  • Gift for the Couple

The advice above is traditional. We realize that things have changed in the past 50 years.

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Wedding planning isn’t just for brides. Here, easy ways to get your guy involved.
by Jennifer Lazarus from Bridal Guide

-Just got engaged? Let him help spread the good news. Divvy up your list so he can call his family and friends.
-Is he creative? Ask him to design an engagement announcement card online to be sent out to family and friends.
-Does he have negotiating skills? Ask him to work out the prices with vendors, and see what kinds of “extras” he can manage to get included in your packages.
-In wedding planning, no task is unimportant. Have him take charge of tipping the vendors. Suggest that he create the tip envelopes to hand out at the reception.
-Nowadays many couples write their own wedding vows. Bring out his romantic side by asking him to express his thoughts. Collaborate on writing the vows, or ask him to research any special readings that the two of you would like to include.
-If carpentry is one of his skills, put him to work (and save money!). Goldberg worked with a groom who built a plywood canopy for his ceremony, which was then covered with orange-and-fuchsia organza fabric.
-Remember those exciting nights out on the town when you first started dating? Have him research bands and DJs, and arrange for the two of you to go out on “dates” to take notes and compare. Once you choose your musicians, he should take charge of providing them with a list of the tunes you both want to hear (and don’t want to hear).
-Ask him to work with your photographer and videographer. Men usually want to make sure they won’t have to pose for too many photos, and they don’t want the photographer to be invasive of their space. Your groom can lay out your mutually agreed-upon rules with your professional.
-“The wine and bar menu for the wedding reception is a very big deal for a lot of grooms,” says Sharon Naylor, author of 1000 Best Secrets for Your Perfect Wedding (Sourcebooks). Suggest he throw a wine-tasting party for a group of friends to test out different wines. “Grooms also love getting behind the bar and making up their own drinks,” adds Goldberg.
-If your guy’s a “foodie,” let him determine the menu, suggest Judith Sherven and Jim Sniechowski, authors of The Smart Couple’s Guide to the Wedding of Your Dreams (New World Library). Even if he isn’t an expert, be sure he accompanies you on your taste-sampling visits to caterers, adds Naylor.
-What groom wouldn’t jump at the chance to pick the big-day transportation? “Exotic car rentals are huge right now,” says Naylor. “The Rolls-Royce, the Bentley, the Lotus Esprit, the Hummer stretch limousines—guys get to test-drive all these exotic cars.”
-Is he a secret fashionista? Have him enjoy choosing his own big-day ensemble, whether it’s a linen tux for a beach wedding or a black tux paired with a colorful vest for a more formal affair. -Ask him to help you play matchmaker and create seating arrangements for your reception tables. Matching personalities can be fun and exciting for the couple to do together.
-“A lot more grooms are taking charge of the diplomatic issues that come up between all the people involved in the wedding planning,” says Naylor. Does he have the skills to mediate between you and your respective families if disagreements arise and discussions heat up? If so, then by all means let him be the official peacekeeper!
-If you’re worried about the best man’s (or anyone’s) toast, ask your fiancé to have a heart-to-heart talk with them about your concerns, suggests Sherven. Nervous about his Uncle Bob’s tendency to party a bit too hearty? Let your groom know about your concerns beforehand, so that he can handle any situation that might arise (it’s always better to be safe than sorry!).
-Make him the unofficial tour guide for your out-of-town guests. Ask him to create a list of sightseeing spots, restaurants and bars in your area so your guests can enjoy your wedding location.
-“More and more men want to take dance lessons because they don’t want to make a fool out of themselves during the first dance,” says Naylor. Have him research local instructors and studios. -Ask him to put on a show to wow your guests by creating a PowerPoint presentation that includes childhood photos of each of you, as well as ones that document your dating relationship and your courtship. This is a surefire crowd-pleaser!
-In regular “wedding update” meetings, get his input on decisions. As time goes on and the big day gets closer, he’ll become more and more involved with the details of the day—and that’s just as it should be. After all, the wedding belongs to both of you!

He wants to help, he may just know how, so give himm suggestions, or even this article!

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I am currently obsessing over the Fall 2009 wedding shows. The shows showed a lot of short styles and off the shoulder-styles. My favorite is the Romona Keveza collection. I love everything about it. The colors are fresh and add a difference level of richness to your wedding design palate.

This dress is so phenomenal!

I love this look below. If you have great shoulders and want to show off your neckline consider a similar style.
The neckline of this dress is so amazing. I love the embellished waistline.

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Welcome to my Blog! I am Erin from Erin McLean Events. As you can see from my site I do Wedding Planning and Event Planning. I am based out of North Carolina, but do Weddings all over the United States.
I am so excited to get this blog up and running. I will be updating this regularly with pictures from Weddings and Events that I do. Also I want to use it as a place for you to come and be inspired by great ideas and fabulous colors and decor! Please email me with any topics that you want to discuss or questions you have! Thanks for reading and come back often!

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